(as I’m still stuck in the internet-less, unsettled, in-between phase of repatriation that involves figuring out where to live, I’ve solicited a few guest posts to keep the blog lively. Friend of the site StuporMundi has graciously offered the first. If you’ve got something to say, feel free to submit via email. Here’s StuporMundi)

In December 2007, on my blog, I first proposed that in the case of a deadlocked Republican National Convention, the Machiavellian pros working in the GOP boiler room would put forth a completely unexpected “unity” ticket so out-of-left-field that its very non-linearity would hypnotize the corporate media and destroy the Democrats’ core campaign strategy. At first, I felt that the Republican “shock and awe” ticket would be Lieberman/Petraeus ‘08, but later I revised my concept to be Petraeus/Lieberman ‘08. My overall selling point for (and fear of) Petraeus/Lieberman ‘08  since then has been that the Republican tactic would prove to be so novel for all the mass media that reporters and pundits would spend the next 2 months following the General around with 9 yards of his shit down their throats. And if that were to happen, the mythical moderate, undecided voter would reflexively be swayed by the media spectacle starring a White Man On A White Horse, and would be obsessed with the idea of voting accordingly. That was my fear, which I psychologically coped with by transforming it into a web-based public prediction. 

I am happy to note that now, even considering how surrealistic and “statistically dense” (as Frank Zappa once said about something else) the Republican presidential ticket and strategy have become, I consider the probability of Petraeus/Lieberman ‘08 to be significantly lower now than I did 3 weeks ago. That said, I feel like claiming credit for two significant original insights just the same:

1. Joe Lieberman is widely to have been at the top of McCain’s list of running mates. Literally everybody I discussed that with rejected it using variations on beltway press logic. I even came up with the idea before The Weekly Standard did.

2. This Republican convention has been completely dominated by a StuporMundi “shock and awe” GOP political ticket, but as executed by a team of pampered white, white men who are literally stupid and unfamiliar with the fundamentals of logic.

My Lieberman prediction was based on my idea that the neocon and military wings of the Republican Party would triumph over the crackers. I believe that would have happened, too, if McCain hadn’t indulged in a very un-Maverick-like departure from character and succumbed to the might of Rush Limbaugh. Who could have known that McCain would crumble when faced with the threat of voters who would never under any circumstances vote for any “negro”? In the final analysis, isn’t he supposed to be a Maverick?

My Petraeus prediction received only one rebuttal that was not rooted in corporate media narrative. Dan suggested that some combination of military tradition, Army regulations, and public law would make it impossible for Petraeus to join the ticket until it would be too late to campaign. It was a concrete argument that I could only rebut with an opinion (not a fact): traditions, regulations, and laws mean nothing to people hellbent on retaining executive powers to protect themselves from answering to The Law. If the mass media go along, anything can happen.

I do not rule out the possibility that McCain will melt down in the next few weeks to a point where he is “no longer able to serve” his party. And I do think it more than likely that Palin will withdraw to spend more time with her family (especially “The Littlest Miracle”) and her mellow state Governor gig. But I now consider the Petraeus/Lieberman strategy to be much less probable than I believed. Even if this VP stunt were to end up being the political end of McCain (and Palin, nationally), I now think the GOP puppet masters would emerge with a conventional couple, such as Romney and Fred Thompson.

Do a thought experiment. Consider how the selection of this one unknown, ineffectual political neophyte (Palin) has completely removed the mass media focus from not only the Obama campaign, but also from international news, the economy, the wars. Think about how all the public attention right now, positive and negative, is on the Republican ticket. Now, consider how differently the media narrative might be playing out right now if McCain had withdrawn 2 weeks ago for “health reasons” and there were a “groundswell” at the convention to draft the “unity” candidate, General David Petraeus. (In your Gedankenexperiment, suspend Dan’s idea that military traditions, regulations, or laws would stop the nomination.) Our Leader, General P! The Man Who Is Above It All. Giddyup, White Horse! The Obamas, er, Osamas, can’t mess with General Dave! Can you visualize this, night after night? Can you imagine how much more biased and mediated and stupid that news and commentary would be than even it is right now? Can you feel how scary it would be to see Petraeus/Lieberman ‘08 playing out before our eyes? I don’t believe that Obama could have beat that team due to the effects of hypnosis on a national scale. And sooner or later, even dopes like the Republicans might figure it out.

A central core of my faith in whatever is that stupidity is self-perpetuating and, therefore, self-annihilating. That is one fair thread hope that I like to cling to.

(Dan again: for what it’s worth, my old bookie Paddy Power is now offering 3-1 odds that Palin’s dropped from the ticket by election day.)